The biggest question mark entering the Mets offseason has been, “Who will replace Sandy Alderson as general manager?” As the search enters the second round of interviews, one of the interviewers himself has submitted his candidacy.

“It happened during the interview with Kim Ng,” Mets COO Jeff Wilpon said. “I was looking around the room while she was talking, and on the wall behind her was a mirror. I saw myself and thought, ‘We’re going about this the wrong way.’”

For years, the Wilpons have been known to have the final say in decisions made by the people they hired to make decisions. It’s time, he says, to cut out the middle man.

“Yes, we hired them to make baseball decisions.” Wilpon admitted. “But, if you think about it, if I’m smart enough to hire the best people, then I’m sure as hell smart enough to make the decisions myself.”

While the Mets play in one of the largest markets in the world, New York City, they consistently have player payrolls that underwhelm fans. The Wilpons also came under fire for not reinvesting the insurance money from David Wright’s contract into the team, instead pocketing it.

“How else are we going to pay off the Jackie Robinson Rotunda?” Fred Wilpon asked.

“I am already the Chief Operating Officer of the team, so not having to hire a new GM would save us some money,” Jeff Wilpon said. When asked if that money will be reinvested into player payroll, Wilpon said, “No, we need it to pay off that pregnant lady.”

With some impressive talent under team control, especially a young and electric starting rotation, it is imperative that the Mets hire a general manager that will not only construct a winning team for 2019, but one that can last for many years to come.

Other candidates for GM include Kim Ng, Chaim Bloom, Bernie Madoff, Brodie van Wagenen, Branch Rickey, Doug Melvin, and Gary LaRocque.